Thursday, December 4, 2017

PA Railroad Museum

Train Car

"saturday 25 nov 17. adventures in Amish land. Gee Julie had picked out Strasbourgh, Pennsylvania (founded by French Huguenots, my Moshiers are from there) so it was only .8 miles to Railroad Museum of Pennsylvania (like them on facebook! Harrisburg's own Deb O'nair of Tina Peel does!) from hotel. walking against traffic, I had to dodge Amish buggies and horseshit but the Amish DID wave to me! ("they must have thought you were one of them"-Gee Julie, who actually had Mennonite cuzzins leave Lembach, alsace lorraine for pennsylvania Deutsch country!). So i find a lil strip mall coz what the fuck ELSE is there to do, land spreading out so far and wide (fuck Boston, yo, gimme dat countryside! that's from the Kenz: Green Acres Rap!). Isaac's restaurants is on facebook and we are only 30 miles from Rising Sun maryland, thus the Pink Flamingos? stopped into a model train store, they had a trump/pence lil car, Pence being descended from Swiss Mennonites burnt out their village, went to alsace-lorraine, then sailt to Philly THEN there's a Moravian settlement in North carolina; another trip. I DID buy Gee Julie a new car! last of it's kind! lil metal ambillance lookin' thang said Uncle Leroy's (they're on facebook!) ice cream, candy, other sweet treats, logo is an amish guy; tourism is big money down here!

So train museum only ten dollars and my grandfather mcBee and his west virginny dad both worked for PBRR, great-grandpa Wilbert 1890s waiter and whilst Ken Kaiser's granddaddy herbert Pelham Smith went to Toronto and swear loyalty to George V or some such, Dad's father pre-WWI (he went in 4 june 18) was a freight clerk in Pittsburgh. they described the jobs plus had over 100 year old trains in museum! I even got to climb inside one. acrost the street was where REAL KIDS could ride on trains (I'm too big to fit into Thomas. and Deja Vu! (Dad was distant david crosby cuzzin). I WAS at this kid's trainyard with my father and my lil brother "Herbie" of 'cavewoman' fame, now a granpa (mother and child are 9th cuzzins!). only other excitement (it's like an Amish version of Brockport NY) was Fireside tavern (every fucken thing is on facebook!) where, sittin' at the bar eatin' pretzels watchin' Mountaineers lose to Sooners (college football with some dork in Sooners hat giving his gurlfriend a play-by-play) bar tender looked like a 70s rocker version of Dad's second wife! fuck if dad had came back from 'nam i'd have grown up here! (custody).Greetings fom Reading Pa!-the gruberger brothers rerun records, saint louis. lastly, lancaster PA PBS, david gilmour pink floyd was on; he is a damn good guitarist and the soul singer on "wish you were here"....fucccckkkkkk! lastly, bartendress, clone of my evil stepmother, DID say "I'm a trailer park girl".....where the fuk WAS John Waters?!?!?!?!???"....

Friday, December 1, 2017

Trump Truck

"sunday 26 nov 17, Strasbourg, pennsylvania. since Pa. allegedly "clinging to guns and Jesus" (thought that was western NY?) I saw a lil church near the toy train. A granny said inside "after i gotta go to the gun shoppe", so let's sunday attend an Assembly of God! Jerry lee lewis (his own cuzzin) and his cuzzin Jimmy Swaggart was raised that way as was Elvis in Tupelo (Elvis also his own cuzzin), so I figgered: "let's check 'em out!" ("Kenneth you're more ecumenical than me" says my mother/cousin, same Congregational church since 1836). Walking agin traffic and dodging Amish buggies and horseshit, I was greeted by some right friendly folk. I counted me PLUS 13, small congregation. But this wasnt Jerry Lee/Elvis Pentecostal; this was more New Age-y. As husband/wife/children droned on 'all tomorrow's parties"/"heroin" D drone, folks were waving multi-coloured flags and a pink haired artist lady blew what looked like a ram's horn. Music and letting go was the theme; folks would bash on drums; i was actually Puritanically inhibited to join in but next tyme I'm there....sermon amounted to "I used to preach in Methodist church but I always felt repressed"....WASPs swarming like Mcbees? hmm, i have same problem....we also were taught Hebrew and it IS in the Bible, making joyous noise etc. (even when you're out of toon or blasting Blue Cheer at 0700 reveille?)....I was told God was watching over me and it IS true! Mark Farner found God in an Assembly of God way the Grand Funk up in Michigan. Music was hypnotic, no songbooks, lyrics on overhead projector and they kept repeatin' em.....afterwards, it being Pennsylvania half hour above Mason Dixon line, I saw Eagles beat Da bears (Ken kaiser informs me Jay Grubeger switched his sports allegiances to Philly once he moved to Reading Pa., birthplace of Daniel Boone!) and Lancaster PBS had a SPLENDID Carpenters special; Karen Carpenter died right before "Best Bette" was recorded! But after my week vacation glad to be back in Boston and being At large and getting Larger! (I'll swap clothes with the Gruberger Brothers once they lose weight and i gain it! Passover Pizza here we come!"......

Horse & Buggy

Horse shit